Into The Looking Glass

Is there anyone who has a passion that they truly just love to do? Well I know I do. My passion and what I feel is my true calling in life is to help people, whether they are in need or if they are not. Helping people is my greatest passion.

I have a further career goal in mind that I am going to purse and starting my blog was my first step to get on that path.

A lot of people live there life scared of going for what they want to do for several reasons. Some are valid reason but then again are they really? It will just take more time to get where you need to be. Others don’t purse what they want to because they don’t have the support, they are worried about what people would say or holding their own self back in fear of failure.

Hmmm ? ? ? None of those seem like a valid reason AT ALL…

1. You don’t need the support of others. Just go for it don’t wait for anyone else to walk for you. You put your pants on one leg at a time by yourself, now walk without a crutch.

2. Whatever passion you may have. You could be doing it to make an income and support you and your family. So answer me this, “Are you going to worry about what another person have to say when you are making an income for you and your family or are you not going to provide for your family because of what the next person got to say”?

3. Understanding that it may be scary to just put yourself out there and go for it but that shouldn’t stop you from chancing your dream. Life is already a risk EVERYDAY, so why not got for what makes you happy in life and take that risk. You will be surprised what the outcome may be.

Let me give you a little insight on me and my passion…. I truly want to be a Life Coach and not only help people but actually be that guide to turn to in any situation. I started this blog to actually start developing a base for my Life Coach Business.

  • No, I didn’t have the money to dive head first into a Life Couching Business.
  • No, I didn’t know what I was looking for or which direction I should even start to take.

I had some laugh’s from people because people didn’t believe me. However, I did have the support of several people around me…. so I thought. People told me they will support me before I started this blog and no that was not the case. I started and as many people told me that they would support, promote and subscribe; there was more than half who haven’t done any of that. (The ones that did subscribe and/ or supported me through this, I CHERISH AND APPRECIATE YOU ALL). For the ones that didn’t but said so much, that alone showed me that people just want to be heard and make it “sound good” for the moment but instead of that support, it was disappoint. And you know the funny part of that, some of the same people are working on doing things in life and you know what they will always have regardless, MY SUPPORT.

If I waited for the next then this blog would not be where it is today. If I was scared to put myself out there again this blog would not be here.

Look at the above picture of the broken looking glass (Mirror). The cracks in it represent the obstacle in your path… Even with those cracks/ obstacles in the way, you know what you are still able to see? You still see the one looking into the looking glass, YOUR OWN SELF !!!

When you look into the looking glass every morning. Live for that person, live for you and only you ; not for anyone else’s satisfaction.

Is This Reality?

What A Year, What A Year….

I know I have been gone for a while, but you know sometimes when people are absent they are just as present. Did I confuse you? Meaning sometimes people need to step away because life has thrown them some lemons and they are over there making a lemonade stand. Although they are absent they are even more focused than before working on life, family, businesses, etc.

2020 was a rough year for many, a great year for some and just a “blahhh” year for others. This pandemic was definitely something that the world was not ready for. It brought so much destruction, uprising, uplifting, headaches, new president, and the list can continue.

I can tell you for me this year has brought some headache, some hardship, but most of all it has gave me so much motivation and growth. Made me more dedicated to pursue my goals and chase my dreams because you never know what life may throw your way but one thing for certain…. NEVER GIVE UP AND KEEP YOUR DRIVE ALIVE!!

I do want to give my deepest regards for all the family’s out there who were affected by the pandemic and hope that every one continues and remains healthy, sanitize and stay safe…Don’t forget your mask.

“There is only one YOU, so be TRUE, just for YOU”, until next time.

Will It Control You or Will You Regain Your Control?

Did you know that trauma is now the leading cause of death for individuals 46 years and younger? You never know what a person has really been through or even going through because you do not know how they really think and feel. You are not the one walking in their shoes.

Many people go through life with a big smile on their face have been traumatized and sometimes do not even know that it is really affecting them because they try and block it out of there mind or bury it to where they feel that they have overcame their traumatic situation.

There is no trauma to big or to small for anyone. The real question and only YOU can look within yourself and find the true answer. Will you let your trauma control you or will you take your control back?

I have been in so many traumatic situations since before the age of even being able to buy a drink at a bar. Am I still dealing with them? Yes! Did I let them ruin and control me? I sure did! Am I regaining my control? YES, I AM!!! I am not going to fake and paint this picture like it is easy, because it’s not easy to finally get over something that has been traumatic to you and has been controlling your life.

(Just a couple of people who took control)

  • The girl who found love in all the wrong places and decided to give up on love and life itself. She was scared and traumatized for years to come in fear of giving her all to someone who did not reciprocate the same feelings. She discovered to love herself and found life easier when she gave up on giving her love to another. (so she thought) The more she fought the feeling to love the more it kept hitting her like a bad habit. “No, I’m good, can’t nobody love me like me”. She was running from the one thing that brought so much pain. She didn’t let it control her and opened up her heart. In doing so she found her lover, best friend, husband, and soul mate. She regained her control.
  • The little boy who was raped, was traumatized for years and did not want so much as a hug from anyone. For years he was in fear and wanted to just remain to himself so he would not even have to go through that again. He finally took his control and got the closure he wanted but he got the closure within himself. He was not going to allow that to control his life.

People need to consider the fact that everyone has a story and not everyone are living the perfect life that is painted in the picture. No, it is not your responsibility to understand or put your life on hold to understand someone’s traumatic experience. However, you should show some type of empathy for that person because sometimes…..Sometimes that’s all we need.

With that being said understanding that we have been through some traumatic experience, when will we stop hiding behind that and live forward with your life? Your traumatic experience has not been forgotten but when will you finally forgive? You are just as guilty for throwing your trauma in everyone’s face. You fail to grow and control it and now are living your life with that trauma control you.

Do not FORGET but FORGIVE. Do not SETTLE but GROW. Do not let your trauma control you but TAKE YOUR CONTROL!!!!

Do Not Forget, You Got It !!!!

You are BEAUTIFUL

You are IMPORTANT

You have a PURPOSE

You are VALUABLE

You are STRONG

“Work on being in love with the person in the mirror who has been through so much but is till standing.”

Misery loves company. Someone who is hurting and is not content with their-self and their life will do whatever they have to do to bring down the next person who is doing something with their life and who is filled with happiness and positivity, I learned that the hard way.

At one point in my life I felt like I always stood on the worlds tallest building but it was little voices and people whispering telling me that I was worthless, that I am ugly, that I was never going to amount to anything. They would always belittle me and bring me down. On the outside I ignored it but on the inside I was hurt and I begin to forget my worth and my value to settle for what the outside world was making me out to be.

Sometimes we as human forget to love ourselves. We tend to stray away from the path that we worked so hard to stay on in blind site of the path chosen for us to walk. There are obstacles placed in our path because we have what it takes to overcome those battles but we forget that we are important, that we have the strength, that we love our-self first.

God gives his toughest battles, to his strongest children. God made you who you are, so why let the words and opinions of mankind allow you to feel less than the best.

If you forget your worth and you value, if you do not hear it and need to hear it. I am hear to tell you, ” You are beautiful, you are strong, you are important, you have a purpose, you mean so much than you give yourself credit for…..Make sure you love yourself, that is something NO ONE can take from you”

Do You Aspire Happiness?

I once thought I could find my happiness through another’s eye. Sure enough I was sadly mistaken. I devoted all my strength, energy, and well being to make that one person the happiest person alive and to be just as happy. Doing so, I found my time was spent being miserable and alone in the end.

Never allow your mind, body, heart, and soul to allow you to feel that you can get your happiness from another person. Never lose your self to value another’s outlook on you or your life. Only you can find your true happiness and only you can keep your true happiness. When you look for happiness from another person and you’ve yet to find your happiness from yourself then you have already failed yourself. When doing that you have already set yourself up for failure to be hurt and/ or let down. You have open the door for an outsider to come in your home and take your happiness. Do you realize what you have done? Do you see that pain and hurt that you are left with? Remember to always find your own self happiness before you add another into your world of happiness and build happiness together. In doing that you have now left room if they exit your world you still have your self happiness to bounce back on and now you are “ Still Standing”.

“Self-worth is so vital to your HAPPINESS. If you don’t feel good about YOU, it’s hard to feel good about anything else” — 

Mandy Hale

The Unknown Victims

As we all know and for some of those that did not know, last month was Domestic Violence Awareness month. Domestic violence is any form of unhealthy and abuse in a relationship. October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, that first began in 1981 by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence as a Day of Unity to connect battered women’s advocates across the country.

This is a very serious situation that a lot of people do not take seriously and several people brush it off as if it is not happening right under their nose. I have seen and know many people who have and even still are dealing with domestic violence. It is a scary situation to be in and even sadder situation to even know about. Many outsider who are not in that situation will quickly say, “Would not be me”. “No, ain’t no way, you better leave them alone”. All of that is easier said than done.

Did you know know 85% of domestic violence victims are women. 1/4 of women worldwide will experience domestic/dating violence in their lifetime. Women between the ages of 20 to 24 are at greatest risk of becoming victims of domestic violence. https://www.dosomething.org/us/facts/11-facts-about-domestic-and-dating-violence#fn3

“Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten”. This is a true statement indeed, however every time I look into domestic violence or look on social media it always speaks about women. Do not get me wrong in most domestic violence cases it is where the woman is the victim. What I have realized with everything I see that the world is forgetting that men to are victims.

I know that men may not speak on the fact they were or even are domestic violence victims. With that being said lets not forget that it is still happening and awareness still needs to be brought to the situation. I have witness and even been a victim of man verses man and woman verses man. Yes, the damage may not show sometimes on the outside but IT STILL IS THERE.

A lot of men because of this “pride-thing” wont come forth and admit to a woman abusing him or even another man abusing him but it is still a battle that is being fought everyday. I do not know the percentage at this moment because again most men will not step up and admit to that but if awareness is not made or even spoke on the fact of men being a victim then how can we expect them to speak up. For all they know that is only happening to them and them alone.

Also, I need people to know that just being violent is not the only form of abuse when dealing with domestic violence. You have physical, verbal, emotional and mental abuse.

FUN FACT: I was once a victim of domestic violence in my past years ago. Yes, I did fight back but after I seen how brutal things got. I told myself I would never put my hands on him again. He took that to his advantage and things were physical but not from me. I wasn’t worried about getting touched of hit on because I was built tough. I was more worried because I knew what I can do and what I was capable of unleashing. The physical abused did not really do anything to me, it was the mental and emotion abuse that did the damage.

Remember its easier said than done. I couldn’t leave, so I painted this picture to everyone that we were good and there was no problems. According to everyone we were “Relationship Goals”, little did they know.

Eventually, I was gone and left that whole situation alone. When a person no matter who, no matter what… When a person finally knows, feels and believes that they had enough that will leave and there will not be anything that will stop them from moving forward. Yes, you will be broken but you are not shattered so you will heal. With time and devotion you will rise up from what was or has been to focusing on moving forward, growing and truly healing.

This blog post was to bring awareness to everyone knowing and not knowing about domestic violence but also shining some light on men who are in the shadows but fighting the same fight as any women when it comes to domestic violence. As you can see I am a man and I was once a victim so bring awareness to men even if they do not speak on it.

For those of you who have been a victim of domestic violence and/or still undergoing this catastrophic nightmare, I am truly and sincerely sorry that you had to endure this pain. I do want you to ask yourself one question. No, do not answer it until you know in you mind, body and soul that you believe your answer is genuinely true. “Are you going to continue this life of pain (regardless if it may come with amenities) or are you ready to be free”? No one can answer that for you but you will know when you are ready. Be safe and rise above.

“There is only one YOU, so be TRUE, just for YOU”, until next time.

You Can Exhale….

Be who you are, there is only one you. So be you and exhale…

In life there are many paths that we go through and some we may not know or even begin to dream that the path may be the right one.

Growing up in this life style and in this era in life people are still being constantly judged on their sexuality. You would be surprised how many people are still struggling with their sexuality. So many people are really killing their selves mentally and physically to keep their secret of who they truly are. Always remember and ask yourself, “Who can really judge you but yourself and the higher source that you believe in”?

Announcing who you are to the world can really be terrifying because you are to concern about how the world may look at you and who may be sitting there ready to judge you, and yes some may be so macho that they feel they can not be who they want to be because everyone want to label homosexuals so many names and terminology but the one that they need to be called….. Their name.

Ask yourself one question, do not rush to answer but truly ask yourself one question and then determine your next move. The move where you want to take that next step forward in life without any worries or second thought of what others may see or think about you.

Do you know who you are? Who you truly are?

In looking at this post it is not a display or representation of your sexual orientation but it is more along the lines of being you and owning the skin that you are in and the person that you are, were and now becoming. You can judge and criticize yourself, you do not need to worry about what anyone has to say or their view on you.

God gives his toughest battles, to his strongest children. God made you who you are, so why let the words and opinions of mankind allow you to feel less than the best.

Bound To You

We all have people in life that we know and feel that we can just never let go. But do you have that one person that you feel you cannot live without? Some of us truly have that one person that no matter what the situation, and no matter where, through time and space that we can never see our life without that person.

No matter where you go, I’m bound to you!

No matter who you are with, I’m bound to you!

No matter the different path we take, I’m bound to you!

When at one point it seemed you two were one, and time took its course and you two were nothing more than a mere memory. Some call it fate, maybe even destiny…. Seemed like the universe aligned the stars to create a path for you to one day find each other.

You never know what you have until its gone, so they say. But if you never truly part ways, does that mean you know what you have and its to good to really go?

Some times it seems in life the simplest of question and feelings are the most complicated to answer.

….In the beginning, it all felt like an epic adventure, a never ending journey. Everything was to right, but maybe the timing was off. Conversation grew weary but the connection was heavy.

What do we do?

What do we say?

Where is the path set to take us?

I cannot really say or even think to image but all I know is I’m Bound To You and that’s FOREVER…..

Dear No One . . . .

Have you had those moment in life where your intentions, your motive and your desire was in the right place but in the end it still seems to have a negative affect on how you thought it would turn out?

A lot of people who have been hurt either in their past and/ or present do not know how to feel and become numb to a lot of thing in life. I am guilty of these act a few time in life and I am sure that YOU have to.

Is your hurt any different from my hurt? Is my hurt any different from yours? No hurt is hurt no matter the depth!!

I have done some wrong in my life but at the same time I have done even more right by myself and to several in life. On the same token the wrong that I have done I know for a fact that it was never intentionally and the wrong I have was a counter reaction of the wrong done to me. THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE and sometimes just a well very much unintentional.

On thing that I recommend and encourage any and everyone to do when you find yourself and your life in situations like the ones that I have been in. Ask for forgiveness for the part you played and apologies for your actions.

I HOPE YOU FORGIVE ME AND I AM TRULY AND DEEPLY SORRY FOR THE ACTIONS THAT I DID TO YOU AND THE HURT THAT I BROUGHT TO YOU …. HOPE YOU FIND WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THAT YOU DID NOT FIND IN ME…

…..To Be Continued

Why Should You?

Why am I starting a blog? Why should you subscribe to my blog? Why should you talk to me? Well I’m not for everyone but here’s what my people say about me.

“He’s a ball of energy. No matter how busy, He’ll always make time to care for others. It’s never too late to ask him for advice or help. His life has not always been easy so he is keen to make sure others do not have to face the same challenges”. That guy is me, Davon Patillo.

Do you want to know why I will be telling my business and why I am going to tell my story? I am not doing this blog for attention and I am not doing it for the fame. While some are following my blog for the latest news and to just get the new gossip. I have been blessed for the support from family, friends and especially the extended supporters. This blog is for the people no matter age, sexual-orientation, gender, or religion who feel like a throw away, feel like an outcast, feeling unworthy and not good enough. If that is you then YOU are who I am speaking to and everyone who need’s to.